A Letter to my 15-Year Old Self

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Do you ever think back to some past point in your life and ponder what you might do differently if you had it all to do over again? I find myself doing that at critical junctures in my life. Recently, I’ve thought about myself as a young teenager and what she might do differently if she had the opportunity to write a different script for her life. I think some of what I determined might be better courses of action for her might apply to others so I thought I would share them with you.

  1.  If I could be 15 years old again, with the wisdom I have now, I would ignore the boy I met at the college basketball that night when I was truly 15. When he came over to me, sat down beside me, and introduced himself, I would get up and walk away. I would know that I wasn’t ready to date anyone, including that boy. I would know that this boy came from a different background and we wouldn’t understand each other. I would sense his underlying bad temper and be fearful of him. I would not waste three years on him and let him change the course of my life forever.
  2. If I could be 15 years old again, with the wisdom I have now, I would be looking at colleges in other cities rather than just in my hometown. I wanted to go to an Ivy League school and I would try to make that happen by getting scholarships. Instead, I let my parents talk me into staying at home and going to college in my hometown. It was a good school, but I wanted to go to a great school – an Ivy league school. Instead of majoring in what was popular at the time, I would double major in Classical Piano and English and head off to New York City after college to seek my fortune – a good music school that would accept me into their program.
  3. If I could be 15 years old again, with the wisdom I have now, I would realize that I would have my friends from my time in the first 12 grades of school with me all of my life but that I would also make other lifelong friends during my life journey. I would not care quite so much about the “sibling” rivalry that springs up in a small private school like mine. Rather, I would realize that when we all grew up, the petty stuff would be gone and we would renew our friendships on an adult level and support each other the rest of our lives.
  4. If I could be 15 years old again, with the wisdom I have now, I would listen to my parents when they advised me not to marry as young as I did. For me, very little good came from marrying so young and, perhaps, a great deal of harm. Marrying young caused me to be unable to know myself as an adult beyond functioning as a half of a couple.
  5. If I could be 15 years old again, with the wisdom i have now, I would spend more time with my parents as they got old. Of course, my dad never got old. He didn’t get that chance and I didn’t get the chance to know him as an adult because, during the few years he lived when I was an adult, he was working hard and I was working hard. We failed to prioritize our relationship – something I will always regret. My mother did get old and spent the last 14 years of her life in my care. Unfortunately, she was beyond strengthening relationships at that point.

IF you could go back to 15 years old, what would you do differently? #amwriting #amblogging #writing #lifestyle

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