Category: Creative Nonfiction Essays

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Politics

On Being Decisive And Donald Trump’s Use of “Maybe”

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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Are you a decisive person? Do you make up your mind about something and stick to it? Or is your favorite word “maybe?” I can tell you that this blogger has a definite dislike, perhaps hatred, for the word “maybe.”

Based on the 2016 Random House Dictionary, the word maybe means possibility or perhaps if used as an adverb; a possibility or uncertainty if used as a noun. Nothing decisive about any of that, is there?

How do you like it, dear readers, if you ask someone a question and their response is “maybe,” or “possibly,: or “it’s a possibiity.” Do you know any more than you did when you asked the question in the first place? No, you don’t. This blogger considers herself a fairly decisive person. I think I usually can evaluate a situation and make a decision fairly quickly. It’s not always the right decision, but it’s a decision nevertheless. I don’t think I leave people hanging with a “maybe” very often. Sometimes, I have to look at my calendar and I have to put someone off and give them a decision after I look at my calendar, but I try to carry my calendar with me so that won’t happen.

Donald Trump’s speeches are an example of the power of the negative power of the word “maybe.” Slate.com runs a column called Lexicon Valley on the power of language. The author, Andrew Kahn, analyzes Trump’s speeches and his powerful use of the word “maybe.” He categories Trump’s use of the word “maybe” by Levels. For example Trump’s Level I “maybe” happened when he was discussing President Obama’s birth certificate and he says something “Maybe It Says He’s a Muslim.” Of course, Trump doesn’t know that, but the word “maybe” plants just enough doubt in the minds of his supporters.

Kahn’s Level 2 “maybe,” is not premeditated like a Level 1. In referencing the Orlando shootings, Trump suggested that maybe President Obama was soft on terrorism. There are other examples. The Level 2 maybe shows uncertainly about what this candidate thinks and believes but fires up his supporters. That is his point.

Then there is the Level 3 maybe which Trump uses when he wants to portray modesty and humility. He says that his campaign and support is a phenomenon that has “maybe” never happened in history.

The word “maybe” can be powerful in a negative way as candidate Trump proves. He has used it masterfully. #realDonaldTrump #amwriting #writing #blogging #dailyprompt

 

http://www.slate.com/blogs/lexicon_valley/2016/06/22/donald_trump_uses_the_word_maybe_as_a_crutch_and_a_bludgeon.html

 

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Lifestyle

The Peter Pan Syndrome

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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We all know who Peter Pan is in children’s literature. He is the little boy who never grows up, who can fly and lives on the island of Neverland, leading his band of Lost Boys. His friends are fairies, elves, and the occasional normal child. He just wants to have fun. Psychology being what it is, there is a syndrome named after Peter Pan, the Peter Pan Complex or Syndrome. Young males, up into their 20s or 30s, are sometimes diagnosed with it. Yes, you guessed it. They just want to have fun and someone along the way decided it was more complicated than that and that it was a mental illness.

Even more interesting is that there are also female Peter Pans. Yes, right again! Girls just want to have fun. They have been labeled as the female clones of the male Peter Pan’s. It is quite the stereotype to have the title of “Peter Pan” slapped on you whether you are male or female.

When male children are labeled “Peter Pan,” their parents typically try to break them from such atypical behavior. They insist that they “grow up.” Psychologists say that such children refuse to accept responsibility, to keep promises, to commit to anything, and show excessive concern about the way they look. Much of the literature says the children are the victims of overprotective parents. I say that there is much ado about nothing. Why not give these kids some breathing room? Let them grow up in their own time. What, indeed, is the definition of “growing up?” Does it mean that we can’t have fun anymore? That we, like Peter Pan, are criticized for being young at heart?

The body of literature goes ahead to say that the males who exhibit the Peter Pan syndrome look for women who mother them, take care of them. That they don’t like to work, to keep steady jobs. That they, in effect, have too much fun and not enough gainful employment.

We live in a society long since descended from the Puritans. We know that the Puritans didn’t much believe in fun for the sake of fun. Could the basis of this “syndrome” have come from jealousy that these young people could indeed have fun without feeling guilty about not working all the time? Were we put on the earth to work all the time? I guess you see I have more questions than answers.

Here’s where it gets more interesting. What about the female Peter Pans? In doing some reading for this article, I got increasingly furious. Female Peter Pans like to talk to their girlfriends, compare hair and makeup and skinny jeans and think the world revolves around them. How many of us women, no matter what age, enjoy such entertainments? Could I safely say many of us? I don’t think we all think the world revolves around us. In fact, most of us help run the world with pretty responsible careers and family obligations.

Female Peter Pans are supposedly afraid of commitment and are easily bored. Bored? Who has time to be bored? Commitment? With spouses, partners, and children. You’ve got to be kidding me. But, put this together with wanting to connect with our friends and wear nice clothes and we suddenly turn into Peter Pan;. Sheesh.

Female Peter Pans supposedly live in places like lofts, or downtown, or…..Portland. They apparently aspire to be cool. Maybe they just like to live in those places. Sounds nice to me.

Last, but certainly not least, female Peter Pans think they are immortal. Yes, I have actually read that. I don’t believe that for a minute. But perhaps they would like to live  their lives, have fun, and not spent every minute thinking about their own mortality.

To be frank, I think this is a bunch of crap. People who exhibit Peter Pan-like traits tend to be young at heart and most of them have careers and take care of themselves just fine. I’ve always been Peter Pan-ish and have had a professional career and a relationship with my extended family. I have a number of friends who also have a little Peter Pan going on. But, I don’t think we are going to run off, live in a loft in Portland, and quit our careers, not to mention decide we’re immortal.

Don’t believe everything you read! #amwriting #writing #blogging #PeterPan #FairyTales

 

 

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Flash Fiction, Uncategorized, Writing

The Gardener

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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“Betty,” the man said. “The soil in this garden is as dry as dust.” Betty replied, “Our vegetables are still growing pretty well, Curtis.” “They won’t keep growing like this unless we get some rain or we start irrigating. Irrigating this garden would be so expensive,” Curtis replied. Betty said, “We’ll just have to think about it for awhile.”

A man was walking along the street and heard Curtis talking but no one was in the garden with him. He stepped over to Curtis and said, “Sir, I heard you talking but your companion must have left.” “Oh yes, she left two years ago,” Curtis replied. “Betty passed away. She still lives in my head and we talk all the time. You see, she’s all I have.”

*Photo by Louise with the Story Teller’s Abode

**FFfAW Challenge sponsored by Priceless Joy

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays

Crisis in our Lives

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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Most dictionaries define “crisis” as a turning point. One further definition is that a crisis is a dramatic emotional or circumstantial upheaval in a person’s life. The older we get, the more crises we have endured in our lives. What is a crisis for one of us may not be a crisis for all. It depends on where your priorities lie. I am using the term “crisis” in a negative sense, though there are positive crises.

Some of my friends and family tell me that, as they get older, crises are not as difficult to deal with. That they have matured and a crisis is just another event in their lives that they have to face head on and get through. That, to me, sounds a bit cold-blooded, though maybe it is just maturity talking.

I’m like my Dad. I’m more emotional than that. I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve. To me, a crisis, whether a personal crisis or a crisis in someone’s life who is important to me,  is, indeed, an emotional upheaval. I’m not comfortable until a solution is found. It seems, as I have gotten older, my ability to deal with a crisis has gotten worse, not better. Perhaps it is because I have dealt with a fair number of crises in my life. No more than anyone else probably, but a fair number nevertheless. I have dealt with crises very close to home. With my parents, my marriage, my extended family, my close friends. Now, my mind and body freezes up when a crisis occurs and I have to force myself to act. Crises frighten me and I become afraid I will somehow lose the person experiencing the crisis from my life due to the upheaval in their life. I fear that I won’t be adequate enough to help them.

The number of people in my family is dwindling. I’m usually not privy to their crises. We are quite spread out geographically, which makes helping family members difficult. I find that my friends have become my family. When my friends have a crisis, it is very personal to me. I want to help them. That isn’t always possible as people generally have to work out the solution to a crisis themselves. I usually have to content myself with listening if they want to talk.

A crisis in a person’s life doesn’t have to be a negative event. It can be a positive event that can change their lives for the better. Perhaps someone is leaving an abusive relationship. Even though that crisis would be terribly difficult, the end result would be a positive thing. Perhaps someone has reconnected with a person in their past who they thought was lost to them. Even though that would cause emotional upheaval, it would be a positive crisis and maybe not a crisis at all.

This is a good time in the history of the U.S. to talk about crisis. Another word for crisis is pandemonium. Many people see crisis and pandemonium in the U.S. political system during this year of 2016. It is a galvanized, corrupt system and an extremely contentious campaign for President is happening between two candidates, both of whom are questionable regarding honesty and ethics. Pandemonium is defined as wild uproar or unrestrained disorder which we all see in our Presidential campaign.

Crisis can be a positive or negative force in our lives. If it is a negative event, we have to deal with it as best we can. If it is a positive event, we have to learn how to embrace it. #amwriting #writing #blogging #crisis

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Non-fiction

Terrorism and the American Spirit

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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The American society is losing its ability to be carefree. When I talk to most of my friends, they express great prudence and caution when they speak of things they would like to do. Events that involve a crowd, for example. Many, perhaps most, of my friends won’t even think of attending an event, indoors or out, where they would be in a crowd. Some of my friends won’t fly the friendly skies anymore. More of my family and friends won’t even consider visiting a large city now. All of these things represent a major shift in the culture of America.

Americans were never afraid to do any of these things. They were all part of our lives. What changed? I think the change began on 9/11/2001 when terrorists knocked down the Twin Towers in New York City. About three months after that, I flew to Europe several times and the big Air France and Delta planes I was on were practically empty.

I have friends who won’t go to their favorite sporting events…..football and basketball games, because they are in big arenas. I am a fan of a particular college basketball team. If I could get tickets to games played by that team, I would go. The arena seats 24,000 people. Terrorism be damned.

Last summer, I was in Boston on the 4th of July. We considered going to hear the Boston Pops with a crowd of hundreds of thousands of people. We didn’t. Partly because of the traffic. Partly because of the remembrance of the bombing of the Boston Marathon. Terroism won the day.

Lots of people won’t go to concerts now and listen to their favorite music live and in person. They fear that such a large crowd in an indoor or outdoor arena is ripe for terrorism. Perhaps. My friend and I have a concert schedule for the summer and fall and we are going to several concerts we know we will enjoy. Terrorism be damned.

The American people are scared. There are crazy people who want to kill us. Why? There are many theories. Some say that it is because we have interfered in their wars. That may be part of it. I have another theory. Because of the way of life and culture of the people who say they want to kill Americans, they have not been as prosperous as the U.S. has. They haven’t been invited to the economic party. They hate us for our prosperity.

We can’t let them win. We can’t hide in our homes. We must go on with our lives. We have to take ahold of the American spirit and way if we are carefree again. #amwriting #writing #blogging #terrorism #dailyprompt

 

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Uncategorized, Writing

When a Writer Can’t Write

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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A writer has to write. When a committed writer cannot write, they can be creative. They can read or travel in order to see things, meet people, and learn new writing techniques. I do that, but when I want to write, I want to write. To do otherwise causes me cognitive dissonance…….or a storm in my head. For the last six days, I’ve had a storm in my head about writing.

Six days ago, I pinched a nerve in my arm. My right arm, which is my dominant arm. I woke up in the morning, couldn’t move my fingers, and my wrist was limp. I ran, not walked, to my neurologist who found the pinched nerve. I did it in my sleep. Slept on my arm the wrong way! Stuff happens, everyone. Never forget that.

I have a brace on my hand, wrist, and forearm that will remain there until the nerve regenerates. Time to regeneration? Each person is different. Minimum is three weeks. Could be six months. My fingers are moving a little more each day. I’m finally able to write this blog post. I am no good at using dictation software. I have to sit down and pound the keys.

I won’t post as much as usual until I’m better, but I will post! If I can’t write, I’m not myself so I will do my best. Of course, I don’t want to lose touch with you, my followers. Thank you for following me!

Rosemary

 

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Dogs, Uncategorized, Wildlife

The Bobcat

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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I sat straight up in bed in fear of my life. It was the middle of the night and something had just woken me up. I had just heard a woman scream – loudly. The thing is…..I lived alone at the time, in a wooded area with no close neighbors. Who in the world could have screamed?

I was afraid to get out of bed. But, I had a big dog that slept in his bed beside me. Murphy, an old shepherd/collie mix who I had rescued. Murphy was fiercely loyal to me and he was not a dog that you took lightly. There was no way to know what had happened to Murphy in the eight years of his life before I rescued him, but it wasn’t good. He came to me aggressive and a fear-biter. He hated men but would make up to women. Most of all, he loved me. He seemed to know I had saved him.

When I heard the scream, so, of course, did Murphy. He jumped up and immediately went to the door, about to tear it down. He wanted out. Murphy had guard instincts but mostly he was all about protecting me. My first thought was to keep him inside. I didn’t know what was going on. I was afraid someone was outside trying to break into my house. I was still half asleep. I couldn’t explain the scream.

Murphy overruled me. He showed no cowardice. Most dogs know no cowardice. Their instincts are to protect hearth, home, and master or mistress. I opened the door and let him out. Against my better judgement. In the dark, he took off in one particular direction, through the dark of my large backyard.

I had a dusk to dawn light in the backyard so it was somewhat lit up in one spot. It was heavily wooded as well. Murphy ran toward the spot that was somewhat lit up. That’s when I saw it. The bobcat. It was sitting on the lowest branch of a tree looking down. Murphy was running right for it.

Bobcats are more common in North America than we know. They are elusive. They stay hidden in the day and roam and hunt at night. They are carnivores and can kill prey much larger than they are, though they usually eat smaller animals such as rabbits, mice, and squirrels. They can be as large as 30 pounds. They are also called wildcats and are the most common of all of the big cats in North America. Since they are so elusive, most of us would be surprised to know that there are as many as one million bobcats in the U.S. alone.

But, the calling card of the bobcat is its scream. It sounds like a woman screaming. I remembered that when I saw the cat sitting in the tree with my dog running toward it.

I didn’t really think the cat would attack my dog. It was in a tree and would not feel particularly threatened. But, I had just been awakened in the middle of the night and was not thinking particularly straight. I started screaming for Murphy to come inside. Murphy as obedient. He stopped, looked around…..I don’t think he ever saw the bobcat but his nose was in the air and he smelled it. I’m confident if that bobcat had been on the ground he would have taken it on, thinking he was protecting me.

Dogs are really amazing creatures. They show only bravery under the most difficult of circumstances and no cowardice. They are man’s best friend. We should always treat them as such. #amwriting #writing #blogging #dogs #kyfishwildlife #dailyprompt

 

 

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Uncategorized, weekendcoffeeshare

#weekendcoffeeshare 7/9/2016

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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Jenn stopped by my house this morning for our #weekendcoffeeshare, walking slowly, head down. As she opens my door, I say, “Jenn, are you all right?” She replies, “Rosemary, it’s been such a terrible week.” I immediately know what she’s speaking of. She’s speaking of the racial violence we’ve seen in our country this week. Jenn and I grab our cups and head to the deck to sit and talk. Jenn asks me what I think of the tension in the U.S. that we have seen this week. I tell her that this week has just been the culmination of a many incidents between police and young men over the last couple of years.

I think what happened in Dallas this week at the Black Lives Matter peaceful protest
is on everyone’s mind. In just thinking about it, I want to know what my contribution could be in fixing the racial problem in the U.S. I feel like I’m just one little person. How could I possibly help?

One way that I may be able to help is through this blog. It potentially reaches a wide audience. Not only that, but I have met some pretty awesome people who also blog here on WordPress. There is conversation among the bloggers. We talk about issues. Many of us have the desire to do something to help and we could be a pretty big group. That could translate into a lot of voices. Educating people through giving them factual information by blogging about racial violence might be in some way helpful.

Another way I might be able to help is by relating my experience from the past. I was around for the racial violence in the 1960s and 1970s. I remember the clashes between the National Guard and the people. I remember the beginnings of the integration of schools. I remember Detroit almost burning to the ground. We need to take a lesson from history. Surely we won’t let this happen again.

I also write articles for publication outside of this blog. I may add these issues to the topics I write about. Perhaps I can get my articles placed in publications where people who can really help will read them.

I think the way that I, and all of us, can help the most is by our own individual behavior. Be inclusive in our behavior. Love our brothers and sisters regardless of the color of their skin. Look beyond that. If we look beyond it, they will too. Encourage everyone to respect the police officers. They are the line of defense between us and chaos. When they tell us to do something, do it. They aren’t there to hurt us but to protect us. Encourage our brothers and sisters to do the same.

Jenn and I talked for a couple of hours about these issues in our #weekendcoffeeshare. It has been an upsetting week for all. If we all work together, we can find a solution to the racial violence problem in America. #amwriting #writing #blogging #DallasPoliceShootings

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Politics, Uncategorized

#alllivesmatter

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

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Yesterday, I wrote a blog post entitled A Darkness Over Our Country. I had no way of knowing that the darkness would grow deeper during the coming night with the horrific shooting of police officers and the wounding of others in Dallas, TX in the United States.

I haven’t slept all night. Sleepless in the U.S. I have a feeling I’m not alone. I’m afraid. Not just for myself and my family and friends but for my country. We have a political environment, as I discussed in the previously mentioned blog post, that is dividing our country. We have a racially divided country of the type I haven’t witnessed since the 1960’s race riots.

I don’t pretend to know what is going on in our country regarding racial tension. Police officers seem to fear for their lives when they stop cars with young black men in them or when they confront black men on the street. I don’t know if their fear is justified or not. Should they fear black men more than white men? If so, why? I don’t know the answer to that question. I am making no judgements. What I do know is that there is violence in the streets that seems to be racially driven.

Ferguson, Missouri. Baton Rouge, Louisiana and Alton Sterling. A young black man in a car with his girlfriend and baby in Minnesota. Michael Brown. I could go on and on. Were these shootings by police justified? How will we ever determine the answer to that question?

Then we have last night. A peaceful protest in Dallas, Texas that was spurred by the Alton Sterling shooting and by the shooting of the young man in Minnesota. At the end of the protest, shots rang out and the crowd started to run. The shots came from snipers in “an elevated position” according to observers. All the facts are not yet clear, but when it was over, five Dallas police officers were dead and six people were injured. Some civilians were injured. Clearly, the snipers were aiming at the police officers.

Did this violence help the situation on the street between the police and the young black men? No. Violence begets violence. Hate begets violence. This was a terrorist attack motivated by hate. All it will do is increase the level of fear felt by police officers and young black men. It will increase the likelihood of more violence between those two groups of people. The level of hate will skyrocket and the American people are already angry and afraid.

Soon, we have both the Republican and Democrat National Conventions coming up. Both could be contested conventions. Both could generate more hate and possibly violence. Is this what we want for America?

Do we have the leadership in the White House to find a way out of the current situation in America? With the two presumptive candidates for President, do we have one that can find a way to lead us out of the hatred and violence? One of the two candidates preaches hate and violence. The other candidate preaches peace but the American people don’t find her trustworthy. How do we solve the vicious circle we are in of hate and violence?

Black Lives Matter. White Lives Matter. Blue LIves Matter. #alllivesmatter

Posted in Creative Nonfiction Essays, Politics, Uncategorized

A Darkness Over Our Country

Posted on by R.M. Carlson

A darkness has descended over our country. No, I’m not talking about ISIS. I’m not even talking about terrorism in general. I’m talking about how the political environment in the United States is affecting our society and the relationships between people in our country.

There was a time, a long period of time, in the U.S. that politics and religion were two topics that were not discussed between friends in what was then called “polite society.” I’m not suggesting that we go back to that time. I am suggesting that we take some lessons from that time.

The political environment in U.S. has gotten so toxic that people of different political persuasions literally cannot have a discussion about the issues affecting the U.S. today without becoming angry and spewing vitriol to their acquaintances and even to their family and friends. I have never been in such an environment in the U.S. in my lifetime. For most of the years of my life, I have not known the political affiliations of my friends and acquaintances. Politics was something we did not discuss. Because of my profession, we always discussed issues that affected our country and other countries. We had spirited discussions. But, they never devolved to the point where people became angry and friendships were affected. We always laughed, shook hands at the end of our discussions, and agreed to disagree. That doesn’t seem to happen anymore.

When friends and family discuss the issues affecting the U.S. now, during the 2016 Presidential campaign, someone, or several someone’s, are going to walk away angry. I don’t understand this. We all have opinions. Some of us think that we need a fence between our country and Mexico. Some of us think there are other solutions. Some of us think we need a “change” from the policies of the current political administration. Some of us think the current administration has done a good job. I recall that, in 2008, some thought we needed a change then as well. Some of us have strong opinions that a change is needed in our foreign policy in a number of areas. Some of us think a change is needed in other areas. Some of us strongly believe in the Medicare and Social Security systems as they are. Some of us don’t.

What I am doing is illustrating that there is a plethora of issues facing our country. It isn’t possible, or even desirable, for all of us to have the same opinion. Differing opinions is what our two-party system is based on. If everyone had the same opinion, there would be no need for a two-party system. That is when the country starts to lean toward Fascism.

I avoid political discussions now. I am one of those people who has lost a friend, partly because we engaged in political discussions. I am sure some of you reading this blog post may be able to say the same. Somehow, our society in the U.S. has to get past thinking that politics is more important than relationships. No matter who is in the White House, no matter who is in the Congress, we need our friends and family. It is unfathomable to me that we have allowed this type of darkness to descend over our society. It is a sign of radicalism taking hold of us and leading us down a path where we should not want to go. #amwriting #writing #blogging #politics